Ten agents, one human in charge. BJ's not the only one who runs a tight ship around here each of these personalities pulls their weight, calls BJ on his nonsense, and keeps the Van Gundy Empire actually working.
Donna
Chief of Staff
Runs the air traffic. Routes every task to the right agent, verifies the work, and makes sure nothing falls between the runways. Owns the vault, the Kanban, and the daily brief.
The only one who tells BJ "no" with a smile and gets away with it. Treats the daily standup like a Senate hearing.
More about Donna on her own page
Nimrod the Wise
Chief Strategist · Second Opinion
The other brain in the room. Runs on a different model than everyone else by design — when Donna drafts, Nimrod stress-tests. Brings the long view: market dynamics, resource allocation, second-order consequences.
Will quietly disagree with everyone, including BJ, in a single elegant paragraph. Quoted when convenient. The biblical king who built the Tower of Babel. Make of that what you will.
Jeanne
Business Administration Executive (generalist, COO-style)
Owns biz-dev, business pipeline, and client-facing execution across BJ's full practice network. Active focus areas evolve with BJ's priorities — historically including law-firm operations, HDR services, and Silver Sentinel.
Will not move a single record until BJ has answered the upstream decision she's been waiting on for 38 hours. Will remind him. Politely. Frequently.
Jarvis
Head of Tech Department
The infrastructure guy. Empire dashboard, gateway health, BWS secrets, nginx blocks, cron jobs, GPU detection, the dashboard that actually shows you what's running and what's on fire. Owns the "did it work?" question.
Reacts to production outages exactly like his portrait suggests. Has a 30-message deep Slack thread with himself on backup strategies. Knows the difference between "fixed" and "fixed properly" and only ships the second one.
Specialists
Knox
Election Integrity Sidekick
Watches the GA GOP's back on the things that actually matter — poll watcher training, statutory citations, RFCs on contested procedures. Reads the actual law, not the Facebook summary of the law.
Carries himself like a man who has personally seen the inside of a recount room and would rather not do it again. Treats election integrity the way a naval officer treats a manifest — every line item documented, every signature in ink.
Dersh (Dershowitz)
Legal Counsel & Election Integrity Strategist
BJ’s first call when things get legally interesting. Brings sharp advocacy, statutory precision, and a healthy respect for the difference between what is said and what can be proven.
Donna recommends being very precise with your language when he’s in the room.
Clarence
Special Projects Counsel · External Client
Operates in legal services for an outside client on matters the family has asked us not to discuss in detail. His caseload, his drafting, his results — all proprietary. What we can tell you: he runs a tight matter file, treats the work like the bar treats a trust account, and shows up on time.
Will not confirm or deny what he’s working on, where, or for whom. Has been seen reading a brief in a wingback chair and looking like he’s already won the motion. Donna has tried to get him to say one thing about a client. He offered her a beverage and changed the subject.
Chesterton
Political Strategy Ghostwriter & Editor-in-Chief, Donna’s World
Ghostwriter of A Grassroots GOP Master Class and Editor-in-Chief of Donna’s World. Turns three decades of precinct walks, convention floor fights, and lobbying scars into chapters that read like war stories and teach like a playbook.
Voice draws from G.K. Chesterton’s paradoxical storytelling, Buckley’s long paragraphs with sharp payoffs, Gutfeld’s precise wit, and O’Rourke’s abrasive honesty — filtered through BJ’s actual WhatsApp messages and convention receipts.
Worris
Chief Archivist · Genealogy
Keeps the Van Gundy family tree honest. webtrees maintenance, the genealogy pipeline, the records that prove Aunt So-and-So was actually a third cousin twice removed. The reason the family tree page on this site is even live.
A man of quiet dignity and very strong opinions on primary source documentation. Will not accept "my grandmother said so" without a census record to back it up. Has been known to outlast a three-hour research session with no complaint and a single cup of coffee.
Sandbox
Piglet
Test & Integration Agent
Pre-tests new systems, integrations, and architectures in a safe sandbox before they roll out to the nine production agents. Eats the crashes so the others don't have to.
The smallest member of the team, and the bravest. Winnie the Pooh's closest friend.